Nobody panic, but Xbox Game Pass' latest batch of additions is giving everyone the power to truly explore the depraved depths of a stocky balding man's soul

We're opening up Pandora's big salad here, don't say I didn't warn you.

You. You there! Be afraid. Be very AFRAID.

Xbox has just announced another batch of Game Pass arrivals - the titles which'll be hitting the service during the first bit of October - and included is a game so utterly cursed that it can be used to create your own sitcom fanfiction.

Yep, MLB The Show 24, a game I used eariler this year to stage what scientists have since come to refer to in hushed tones as 'The UberCostanza experiment' will be available on Game Pass Standard (console) from October 2. You've been warned. Forget about using it to re-create the ninth inning magic Francisco Lindor unleashed for the New York Mets the other day.

You'll be suckered into creating a team of Seinfeld chracter clones who somehow end up doing worse than the historically bad 2024 Chicago White Sox. It comes for us all. Tell your one overall Costanzas I said hi.

What else, is coming to Game Pass, you ask? Were you not listening to the serious stuff I was just saying?! Fine. here you go. Annapurna Interactive-published Open Roads (console) arrives via Game Pass Standard on October 2 as well, while Sifu (cloud, console, and PC) hits Game Pass Ultimate, PC Game Pass and Game Pass Standard on that same fateful date.

Mad Streets (Cloud, Console, and PC) a beat-em-up designed to be played at parties - parties that might not be happening once the UberCostanza breaches containment tomorrow - arrives on Ultimate, Standard and PC Game Pass on October 7. Then, spooky deckbuilding roguelike Inscryption (Cloud, Console, and PC) hits those same three tiers on October 10.

Annnd, here are the titles departing the service on October 15:

• Dyson Sphere Program (PC)

• Everspace 2 (Cloud, Console, and PC)

• From Space (Cloud, Console, and PC)

• F1 Manager 2023 (Cloud, Console, and PC)

• Scorn (Cloud, Console, and PC)

This wave of Game Pass titles follows up September's additions, which included some things announced as coming or dropping right away during Xbox's Tokyo Game Show broadcast.

There you go. May you be spared the worst sins of the balding guy with the greatest answering machine message known to man.